Mr.P loves high tech gagets, computers, etc. He fully admits to being a geek, and I love his geekiness (we even have a onesie in our stash that is green with the words "my dad's a geek" embossed on the front).
This evening we were shopping at U Village. Mr.P loves making small talk with random people, so as we waited in line at Starbucks, he commented to the people behind us, "That's a really nice baby carriage you've got there." I noticed it, the aerodynamic wheels/frame...it looked expensive. The norwegian name embroidered on the undercarriage indicated to me that this was the Volvo of baby carriages. I politely smiled and said to Mr.P, "And when we have a baby, you can do all the consumer research into all the stroller options!" His smile was sincere, since there is no doubt he will research all the options for days on end, when the time comes. That's just how he is, and it's one of the things I love about him.
After we left the Starbucks, I told Mr.P that particular baby carriage was probably over $1000. He seemed surprised, but kind of shrugged his shoulders. When we got home I looked it up online, just for shits and giggles. Yup, that model was $1200. I laughed and showed him the website on my laptop.
He responded with, " Well, a good baby stroller isn't going to be cheap. We both drive BMW's...our kid isn't going to ride around in the Hyundai of strollers, that's for sure."
Hmm...he has a point.
Sunday, November 23, 2008
Friday, November 21, 2008
I have to share air with these people?
Mr.P teases me about my slight addiction to people.com (People magazine online). I know, I probably lose precious brain cells each time I read it.
I saw this morning that Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz had their baby, a boy named Bronx Mowgli Wentz. Seriously? I'm not a fan of trendy names (like naming kids after cities), but I also don't like harsh sounding combinations. The middle name aside, Bronx Wentz does not flow together. Just another dumb celebrity couple giving their kid a stupid name!
I cringe when I hear most of the names that people are frequently giving children these days. I used to laugh about names I deemed to be "stripper/porn star" names, but even some of those names seem tame in comparison to the rediculous and unusual names of recent years. I really like my name, it is wholesome and traditional. All members of my family and Mr.P's family have what I would consider to be "normal" names with standard spellings (the only exception is one set of cousins who have Hawaiian names given by their father who was raised in Hawaii).
Since we are in the TTC process, we've obviously discussed names at length. Mr.P has a roman numeral after his name (he's the 4th) and I've known since our 3rd date that if we were to have a son, he must be the 5th. As for girls, the first born daughter will be named after my mother. We have a few other names that we like if we have multiple children, and all of those names are traditional and biblical.
I'm also not a fan of creative ways to spell a name. Like Jayden, Jaidon, Jaydyn. When I was a kid I loved to get personalized souveniors on vacations. With funky name spellings, that makes it near impossible for a kid to experience this. One friend who works with newborns in a local hospital joked that she thinks some of the parents are too dumb to spell the name properly on the birth certificate, and that other people think it'll make their kid special if his/her name is spelled differently.
Whatever. I think it's completely stupid, but that's just my opinion!
I saw this morning that Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz had their baby, a boy named Bronx Mowgli Wentz. Seriously? I'm not a fan of trendy names (like naming kids after cities), but I also don't like harsh sounding combinations. The middle name aside, Bronx Wentz does not flow together. Just another dumb celebrity couple giving their kid a stupid name!
I cringe when I hear most of the names that people are frequently giving children these days. I used to laugh about names I deemed to be "stripper/porn star" names, but even some of those names seem tame in comparison to the rediculous and unusual names of recent years. I really like my name, it is wholesome and traditional. All members of my family and Mr.P's family have what I would consider to be "normal" names with standard spellings (the only exception is one set of cousins who have Hawaiian names given by their father who was raised in Hawaii).
Since we are in the TTC process, we've obviously discussed names at length. Mr.P has a roman numeral after his name (he's the 4th) and I've known since our 3rd date that if we were to have a son, he must be the 5th. As for girls, the first born daughter will be named after my mother. We have a few other names that we like if we have multiple children, and all of those names are traditional and biblical.
I'm also not a fan of creative ways to spell a name. Like Jayden, Jaidon, Jaydyn. When I was a kid I loved to get personalized souveniors on vacations. With funky name spellings, that makes it near impossible for a kid to experience this. One friend who works with newborns in a local hospital joked that she thinks some of the parents are too dumb to spell the name properly on the birth certificate, and that other people think it'll make their kid special if his/her name is spelled differently.
Whatever. I think it's completely stupid, but that's just my opinion!
Thursday, November 20, 2008
There are no words....
Tonight I found out that my grandmother was robbed today. She left her door unlocked while her gardener was over working in the yard, and a strange man walked into her house. He stole several hundred dollars in cash from her purse, all her credit cards, and tons of her antique jewelry she has spent a lifetime collecting.
Grandma is a sweet old lady, blind in one eye and barely mobile (she uses a walker but should be in a wheelchair). It really takes a low life to walk into an old woman's home and steel from her, right in front of her, while she is unable to fight for her property. She is completely devastated about this, as is the whole family who have allowed her the freedom to continue living on her own. I hope that the man who did this is caught, or at least experiences the karmic repercussions he is due for such a horrible crime.
Grandma is a sweet old lady, blind in one eye and barely mobile (she uses a walker but should be in a wheelchair). It really takes a low life to walk into an old woman's home and steel from her, right in front of her, while she is unable to fight for her property. She is completely devastated about this, as is the whole family who have allowed her the freedom to continue living on her own. I hope that the man who did this is caught, or at least experiences the karmic repercussions he is due for such a horrible crime.
Choosing the red pill or the blue pill?
I started taking vitamins last spring when I started doing Weight Watchers. I bought a big 500 count bottle of multi-vitamins at Costco. This summer when I went off BCP, I was going to switch to a prenatal vitamin, but when I compared the ingredients of the prenatal to the multi I was already taking, the only major difference was that the prenatal had twice the folic acid. So now I take my regular multi-vitamin along with a seperate folic acid supplement to give me the same folic acid that the prenatal would have contained.
But it doesn't stop there. I also take a vitamin D supplement because Mr.P's father is convinced it is the cure for cancer. (Seriously. He showed me all sorts of information and research that showed all the benefits of extra vitamin D, including reduced risk of certain cancers). It couldn't hurt, right? Besides, I'm not really a "hang out in the sun" kind of girl, paired with the fact that I live in a gray and rainy climate, which means I'm already missing out on the natural vitamin D exposure.
Mr.P likes to tease me and call me a pill popper because each night I lay out my vitamins and allergy meds on a little dish on the kitchen counter (so I don't forgot to take them). I take 1 allergy med in the morning, and 2 allergy meds at night, in addition to my 3 vitamin pills that I take in the morning. I suppose it looks like a lot on the little plate. Since we started TTC, I've also got Mr.P taking one of the multi-vitamins each morning. This is actually a big deal because Mr.P is anti-medicine. He won't even take tylenol or ib profin for a headache! It took some convincing to get him to agree to take the vitamin (maybe a little guilt tripping about how the vitamin can improve the quality of his sperm...but that is neither here nor there). Now he willingly takes his vitamin, but on the condition that once we get pregnant he can stop.
Today is cycle day 3...aka, time to start the meds that will induce ovulation. I did a lot of research into this medication before deciding to take it. I definitely did not want to take the most commonly prescribed ovulation med because it has a higher risk of multiples (10% higher than naturally conceiving multiples), and I want to try to keep this process simple. Not that twins wouldn't be lovely (I am a twin!) I just don't think I want to be a first time mother to twins. I'd rather just have one baby for now. My doctor prefers to prescribe the med I'm taking for anovulation because it has less side effects, and that made me feel a little better about taking it.
So as I opened my pill bottle this morning and pulled out my little pill, I thought, "This is it." I felt like Neo on The Matrix, being offered the blue pill to go back to his ordinary life, or the red pill to move forward. My pill is neither blue or red (actually it's yellow). I feel like I could not take it and hope that my body would start ovulating on its own, or I could take it and hope that it works to help us start our family. Not that taking this pill is any big adventure, but it does give me a little sense of panic and excitement to feel like we're moving forward. We'll see what happens in the next few weeks!
But it doesn't stop there. I also take a vitamin D supplement because Mr.P's father is convinced it is the cure for cancer. (Seriously. He showed me all sorts of information and research that showed all the benefits of extra vitamin D, including reduced risk of certain cancers). It couldn't hurt, right? Besides, I'm not really a "hang out in the sun" kind of girl, paired with the fact that I live in a gray and rainy climate, which means I'm already missing out on the natural vitamin D exposure.
Mr.P likes to tease me and call me a pill popper because each night I lay out my vitamins and allergy meds on a little dish on the kitchen counter (so I don't forgot to take them). I take 1 allergy med in the morning, and 2 allergy meds at night, in addition to my 3 vitamin pills that I take in the morning. I suppose it looks like a lot on the little plate. Since we started TTC, I've also got Mr.P taking one of the multi-vitamins each morning. This is actually a big deal because Mr.P is anti-medicine. He won't even take tylenol or ib profin for a headache! It took some convincing to get him to agree to take the vitamin (maybe a little guilt tripping about how the vitamin can improve the quality of his sperm...but that is neither here nor there). Now he willingly takes his vitamin, but on the condition that once we get pregnant he can stop.
Today is cycle day 3...aka, time to start the meds that will induce ovulation. I did a lot of research into this medication before deciding to take it. I definitely did not want to take the most commonly prescribed ovulation med because it has a higher risk of multiples (10% higher than naturally conceiving multiples), and I want to try to keep this process simple. Not that twins wouldn't be lovely (I am a twin!) I just don't think I want to be a first time mother to twins. I'd rather just have one baby for now. My doctor prefers to prescribe the med I'm taking for anovulation because it has less side effects, and that made me feel a little better about taking it.
So as I opened my pill bottle this morning and pulled out my little pill, I thought, "This is it." I felt like Neo on The Matrix, being offered the blue pill to go back to his ordinary life, or the red pill to move forward. My pill is neither blue or red (actually it's yellow). I feel like I could not take it and hope that my body would start ovulating on its own, or I could take it and hope that it works to help us start our family. Not that taking this pill is any big adventure, but it does give me a little sense of panic and excitement to feel like we're moving forward. We'll see what happens in the next few weeks!
Tuesday, November 18, 2008
I think Jared must suffer from some serious hypertension.
I'm not really a salty foods kind of person. I've had this inner ear thing since I was in high school, and since then I've always been very conscious of my salt intake.
I forgot my lunch today, and was trying to do something healthy. I went to Subway. I got a 6 inch meatball sub (Ok, I know, not the healthiest one they have, but it looked like the tastiest and and I needed something to take my mind off the miserable cramps I was experiencing). The sub tasted delicious! I would go there more often, except the chicks who work at the Subway by my office kind of look like methheads....but that would be a whole different post for another day.
Later this afternoon I started feeling so bloated, even my fingers were looking slightly sausage like. I looked on Subway's website and balked at the sodium content of their sandwiches. Damn! I think the bread must have a shelf life of 2 years seeing as how much sodium it has....how the heck could Jared eat those things for months?!
I forgot my lunch today, and was trying to do something healthy. I went to Subway. I got a 6 inch meatball sub (Ok, I know, not the healthiest one they have, but it looked like the tastiest and and I needed something to take my mind off the miserable cramps I was experiencing). The sub tasted delicious! I would go there more often, except the chicks who work at the Subway by my office kind of look like methheads....but that would be a whole different post for another day.
Later this afternoon I started feeling so bloated, even my fingers were looking slightly sausage like. I looked on Subway's website and balked at the sodium content of their sandwiches. Damn! I think the bread must have a shelf life of 2 years seeing as how much sodium it has....how the heck could Jared eat those things for months?!
Let's talk about: periods.
*A small disclaimer: this may be gross. If you can't handle discussing blood or bodily fluids, this post is not for you*
It was only in the past few months that I learned that a period only occurs after a normal menstrual cycle that includes ovulation. If you are anovulatory (like me) when you "get your period" it's not really a period, it's actually called breakthrough bleeding. Breakthrough bleeding is often not as heavy as a period, and it doesn't usually involve all the symptoms one would get with their period (like heavy cramps, bloating, headaches). Women who take hormonal birth control also do not get a period, again, it's just breakthrough bleeding.
After years of hormonal birth control, followed by months of anovulation, I don't really remember what a real period is like.
Until today.
The prescription that I was taking a couple weeks ago (the one that made me nauseas) was a drug called Provera. The purpose for taking it was to bring on a period. Not breakthrough bleeding, but a period to reset my cycle. I asked the doctor about the necessity of taking this as opposed to just waiting for my next breakthrough bleeding cycle, but she assured me that it was important to bring on a true period. My next prescription is an ovulation inducing drug to be taken cycle days 3-7. She said if I did not have a true period, the uterine lining would not be the right thickness to enable pregnancy after the ovulation induction occurs. I'll take her word on that.
The Provera was to trick my body into thinking it had a normal menstrual cycle so that it would bring on an actual period. Since it's been YEARS since I had an actual period, this one is my body's revenge on me. Debilitating cramps, extremely heavy flow, mood swings, bloating....I actually started crying earlier today because I was so miserable.
I would love to climb into a nice warm bathtub, but my tiny ass house only has a shower. When we bought our house I recognized it was technically only a 3/4 bath house, but at the time I didn't think it would be that big of a deal to not have a tub. Hahahaha. Every time I go to my sister's house I look forward to a nice soak in her tub. The next house we buy must have a bathtub.
It was only in the past few months that I learned that a period only occurs after a normal menstrual cycle that includes ovulation. If you are anovulatory (like me) when you "get your period" it's not really a period, it's actually called breakthrough bleeding. Breakthrough bleeding is often not as heavy as a period, and it doesn't usually involve all the symptoms one would get with their period (like heavy cramps, bloating, headaches). Women who take hormonal birth control also do not get a period, again, it's just breakthrough bleeding.
After years of hormonal birth control, followed by months of anovulation, I don't really remember what a real period is like.
Until today.
The prescription that I was taking a couple weeks ago (the one that made me nauseas) was a drug called Provera. The purpose for taking it was to bring on a period. Not breakthrough bleeding, but a period to reset my cycle. I asked the doctor about the necessity of taking this as opposed to just waiting for my next breakthrough bleeding cycle, but she assured me that it was important to bring on a true period. My next prescription is an ovulation inducing drug to be taken cycle days 3-7. She said if I did not have a true period, the uterine lining would not be the right thickness to enable pregnancy after the ovulation induction occurs. I'll take her word on that.
The Provera was to trick my body into thinking it had a normal menstrual cycle so that it would bring on an actual period. Since it's been YEARS since I had an actual period, this one is my body's revenge on me. Debilitating cramps, extremely heavy flow, mood swings, bloating....I actually started crying earlier today because I was so miserable.
I would love to climb into a nice warm bathtub, but my tiny ass house only has a shower. When we bought our house I recognized it was technically only a 3/4 bath house, but at the time I didn't think it would be that big of a deal to not have a tub. Hahahaha. Every time I go to my sister's house I look forward to a nice soak in her tub. The next house we buy must have a bathtub.
Monday, November 17, 2008
Moving forward.
I feel like I'm starting to break out of my funk. My patience is growing, and I'm feeling less consumed with thought about the TTC process. It's been nice the past two weeks knowing where I stand in the process, and not having to worry about checking my temp each morning or doing the ovulation predictor tests. Two weeks ago I felt impatient knowing that I was going to have to reset my cycle and it would take a month or so from there before we could actually try to make this happen, but now I'm enjoying my time. I've started giving myself positive affirmations about the time ahead:
"I can enjoy some great wine over Thanksgiving weekend since I won't be pregnant or ovulating yet!"
"If we get pregnant around Christmastime, the baby's due date will be right around my birthday! How cool would that be?!"
"If we get pregnant in the next few months, we can make really cute Valentine's Day announcement cards!"
Maybe that sounds cheesy to be thinking like this, but it helps make me feel good and makes me less anxious about waiting.
I've also gotten my butt in gear at work and I've been able to catch up on stuff (after the death in our office I was quite unmotivated). J's position has not been filled yet, but I'm somehow managing to get both my workload and his taken care of.
Now I need to start planning for Christmas! I'm way behind where I'm normally at with my shopping/gift buying. Usually I have most gifts ordered/purchased by Thanksgiving, and so far I have very little done.
"I can enjoy some great wine over Thanksgiving weekend since I won't be pregnant or ovulating yet!"
"If we get pregnant around Christmastime, the baby's due date will be right around my birthday! How cool would that be?!"
"If we get pregnant in the next few months, we can make really cute Valentine's Day announcement cards!"
Maybe that sounds cheesy to be thinking like this, but it helps make me feel good and makes me less anxious about waiting.
I've also gotten my butt in gear at work and I've been able to catch up on stuff (after the death in our office I was quite unmotivated). J's position has not been filled yet, but I'm somehow managing to get both my workload and his taken care of.
Now I need to start planning for Christmas! I'm way behind where I'm normally at with my shopping/gift buying. Usually I have most gifts ordered/purchased by Thanksgiving, and so far I have very little done.
Thursday, November 13, 2008
Waving my freak flag.
I received an envelope from the UW Medical Center today. At first I had a moment of panic thinking it was a bill (even though my insurance supposedly covers 100% of fertility related costs). Inside the envelope was the following typed letter:
Dear (PhinneyGirl),
Your pregnancy test was negative. I am looking forward to the results of your ovulation induction.
Sincerely,
Dr. H.
Hahaha...the backstory is funny:
Ok, so I mentioned before that I went in last Monday (for tests) and Tuesday (for the results). On Monday I had to give both a urine sample and a blood sample. I have serious issues with giving urine samples. Here's a bit of personal information: I have a shy bladder. No matter how badly I have to pee, if I am expected to do so on cue for a test, I freeze up and I can't go. Can't. I wish I could explain it, but I've had this problem my whole life. In fact, until I went away to college I had a very hard time using public restrooms (obviously this got better over time as I had to adapt to shared bathroom facilities during the past 10+ years of communal living).
So Monday during my RE appt, the doctor gave me the urine sample cup and asked me to go in the restroom and do my business and she would wait. Did I mention that the shy bladder problem gets worse when I know that someone is waiting for me? After 5-10 minutes in the bathroom (and with a full bladder) I went back to the exam room and muttered something about not being able to go. The doctor said that was fine, she would do my pelvic exam and I could take care of the urine sample after the exam.
I left the RE's office on the 3rd floor, and went down to the 1st floor where the lab is located. I did my blood draw (not a problem. Sad that I'd rather give blood than urine!) I then went into the 1st floor restroom. No trouble peeing in the cup in that bathroom! This may be TMI...but I then placed the (sealed) cup of urine in my purse. I went back up to the 3rd floor, went into the restroom, waited a minute, and then left my cup in the box where urine samples were to be placed. I gave a huge sigh of relief and left the office. Mission accomplished!
The next day was my test results appt. When the doctor came in the exam room, she pulled out a urine collection cup from a drawer. She handed it to me and said I'd need to give another sample since the nurse waited too long to test my first sample. (The purpose of the urine sample was simply to test for pregnancy since the drugs they are prescribing me to help me get pregnant are actually harmful to take during pregnancy).
I probably looked like I was going to cry (seriously, the thought of having to produce another urine sample was very upsetting). The doctor could sense I was upset, so she said, "Or if you prefer, I can just call down to the lab and have them do a blood pregnancy test from the blood draw they did yesterday, that will be more accurate anyway." I wanted to hug her when she said this! Of course I was incredibly relieved. She told me that she would call me either later that day or the next morning if the test was positive, since I was to start taking the meds the next day. She said if I didn't hear from her, it meant the test was negative. I knew it would be negative (obviously, if you're not ovulating there's no chance of getting pregnant).
As for her looking forward to the results of my ovulation induction? Yeah lady, I'm looking forward to that too. Thanks.
Dear (PhinneyGirl),
Your pregnancy test was negative. I am looking forward to the results of your ovulation induction.
Sincerely,
Dr. H.
Hahaha...the backstory is funny:
Ok, so I mentioned before that I went in last Monday (for tests) and Tuesday (for the results). On Monday I had to give both a urine sample and a blood sample. I have serious issues with giving urine samples. Here's a bit of personal information: I have a shy bladder. No matter how badly I have to pee, if I am expected to do so on cue for a test, I freeze up and I can't go. Can't. I wish I could explain it, but I've had this problem my whole life. In fact, until I went away to college I had a very hard time using public restrooms (obviously this got better over time as I had to adapt to shared bathroom facilities during the past 10+ years of communal living).
So Monday during my RE appt, the doctor gave me the urine sample cup and asked me to go in the restroom and do my business and she would wait. Did I mention that the shy bladder problem gets worse when I know that someone is waiting for me? After 5-10 minutes in the bathroom (and with a full bladder) I went back to the exam room and muttered something about not being able to go. The doctor said that was fine, she would do my pelvic exam and I could take care of the urine sample after the exam.
I left the RE's office on the 3rd floor, and went down to the 1st floor where the lab is located. I did my blood draw (not a problem. Sad that I'd rather give blood than urine!) I then went into the 1st floor restroom. No trouble peeing in the cup in that bathroom! This may be TMI...but I then placed the (sealed) cup of urine in my purse. I went back up to the 3rd floor, went into the restroom, waited a minute, and then left my cup in the box where urine samples were to be placed. I gave a huge sigh of relief and left the office. Mission accomplished!
The next day was my test results appt. When the doctor came in the exam room, she pulled out a urine collection cup from a drawer. She handed it to me and said I'd need to give another sample since the nurse waited too long to test my first sample. (The purpose of the urine sample was simply to test for pregnancy since the drugs they are prescribing me to help me get pregnant are actually harmful to take during pregnancy).
I probably looked like I was going to cry (seriously, the thought of having to produce another urine sample was very upsetting). The doctor could sense I was upset, so she said, "Or if you prefer, I can just call down to the lab and have them do a blood pregnancy test from the blood draw they did yesterday, that will be more accurate anyway." I wanted to hug her when she said this! Of course I was incredibly relieved. She told me that she would call me either later that day or the next morning if the test was positive, since I was to start taking the meds the next day. She said if I didn't hear from her, it meant the test was negative. I knew it would be negative (obviously, if you're not ovulating there's no chance of getting pregnant).
As for her looking forward to the results of my ovulation induction? Yeah lady, I'm looking forward to that too. Thanks.
Wednesday, November 12, 2008
Great minds think alike....
I was super excited about the Christmas gift I got for Mr.P last weekend at a silent auction. Not only did I find him an awesome gift, the money I paid for it went to a great local charity. Score!
During my weekly phone call with my mother, I mentioned the gift and how excited I was about it. She responded with an, "Oh no." I was like, "What?" Then she proceeded to tell me that she had bought the same gift as a combined gift for he and I for Christmas. I laughed about how funny that was, and she got mad. She exclaimed, "You shouldn't be going out and buying stuff right before the holidays! You've ruined my gift now!"
Um, yeah...it's not like I was out "buying stuff" before the holidays...I was shopping for a gift for my husband! Geez. She's lucky I told her, it'll be a lot easier for her to return the item now then it would be in a few months!
During my weekly phone call with my mother, I mentioned the gift and how excited I was about it. She responded with an, "Oh no." I was like, "What?" Then she proceeded to tell me that she had bought the same gift as a combined gift for he and I for Christmas. I laughed about how funny that was, and she got mad. She exclaimed, "You shouldn't be going out and buying stuff right before the holidays! You've ruined my gift now!"
Um, yeah...it's not like I was out "buying stuff" before the holidays...I was shopping for a gift for my husband! Geez. She's lucky I told her, it'll be a lot easier for her to return the item now then it would be in a few months!
I'd like to order a tall coffee and some sunlight.
All day I kept contemplating a drive down to Starbucks. Part of it is to have a warm coffee beverage, part of it is to escape the office. Since there was a funeral where I work today and the parking situation was a bit dicey due to said funeral, I opted to wait until that event was over. About ten minutes ago I started debating what to order, and I realized that I hadn't had caffeine in a week. Yay PhinneyGirl! But then I remembered, oops, I had a triple grande soy gingerbread latte yesterday (and it was delicious). In my efforts to cut back on caffeine, I decided that I should not have caffeine two days in a row. I also lack the willpower to walk into a Starbucks and willingly order decaf, so instead I'll just avoid it all together. Sigh.
Is it just me or is it getting dark really early? I know, daylight savings time kicked in, but seriously, it's barely after 4 o'clock here and it's nearly pitch black outside! It seemed like last week we still had some daylight around 4 o'clock. I can handle the rain no problem...but the darkness really gets to me. I shudder at the thought of the months ahead where I arrive at work in the dark, and leave in the dark.
Is it just me or is it getting dark really early? I know, daylight savings time kicked in, but seriously, it's barely after 4 o'clock here and it's nearly pitch black outside! It seemed like last week we still had some daylight around 4 o'clock. I can handle the rain no problem...but the darkness really gets to me. I shudder at the thought of the months ahead where I arrive at work in the dark, and leave in the dark.
Tuesday, November 11, 2008
Stay at home wife for a day.
It was nice waking up knowing I didn't have to go to work today. I drove Mr.P to work since I was planning on running errands near his office. I went shopping at Target, and was able to contain myself from making impulse purchases (I'm really bad about that). I was able to spend an hour wandering around Target, and I escaped spending well under $100. I got a couple little Christmas gifts, a bunch of dry goods and soups (who knew Target had such a great grocery area?) I also found a shelving unit for our pantry.
When we moved into our house, I unpacked the kitchen in a hurry and just hastily put things away. It's not very efficiently organized, and we have long been out of space to the point where we have random things on the counter that should really be put away (like the toaster. Do we eat toast? Sometimes...like once every 3 months!) The shelving unit is great because already it has freed up two cupboards that can now house the various appliances and junk that was cluttering the counters.
I also installed some new hooks on the backs of our doors to hang towels/robes/jackets. I've gotten several loads of laundry done, and I got caught up on the 90210 episodes I've had in the DVR que. Next up is making dinner, then tonight I'm going to catch up on ironing and watch a movie! It's nice to have a "stay at home wife" day where I can get some domestic things taken care of. I'm a little sad about going back to work tomorrow, but I think it's for the best. If I were a stay at home wife all the time, I think I'd get really bored.
When we moved into our house, I unpacked the kitchen in a hurry and just hastily put things away. It's not very efficiently organized, and we have long been out of space to the point where we have random things on the counter that should really be put away (like the toaster. Do we eat toast? Sometimes...like once every 3 months!) The shelving unit is great because already it has freed up two cupboards that can now house the various appliances and junk that was cluttering the counters.
I also installed some new hooks on the backs of our doors to hang towels/robes/jackets. I've gotten several loads of laundry done, and I got caught up on the 90210 episodes I've had in the DVR que. Next up is making dinner, then tonight I'm going to catch up on ironing and watch a movie! It's nice to have a "stay at home wife" day where I can get some domestic things taken care of. I'm a little sad about going back to work tomorrow, but I think it's for the best. If I were a stay at home wife all the time, I think I'd get really bored.
Monday, November 10, 2008
Ticking away, the moments that make up a dull day...
*The title is from one of my favorite Pink Floyd songs, Time*
Earlier today as I was reviewing each blog post to change names (to make the blog a bit more anonymous) I read through each old post. How much things can change in a matter of months! It's funny that time can move either slow or fast, depending on where you are at in life. For me, the past several months have moved very slowly. Not that it's a bad thing, I have certainly enjoyed my time.
In July I posted about Mr.P and I being in the discussing/planning phase of having a baby. A month later we were in the, "Let's make a baby!" mindset. Ha, if only it were that easy. I feel like once we got on the baby track, time began moving soooo slow. It's not like you can just have sex and, bam, a baby is made. Sorry friendo's, the process is a little more challenging. You have to wait until ovulation time (assuming one is actually ovulating) and even then, the window of fertility is only about 24 hours, and if sex is timed accordingly, the odds of conceiving are less than 20%. Like I've said before, babies are a miracle (unless you're a crack whore...then it's no problem getting knocked up).
The past month or so I have felt this nagging sense of limbo...not wanting to commit to plans a few months out "in case" we're pregnant. It sucks, I wish I could just freely know what was going to happen. I'm already dealing with the disappointment of knowing that we won't have a "pregnancy anouncement" for our families for the holidays. That would've been fun. I'm also realizing that if we do get pregnant in the next few months, that will mean I'll be huge (which means uncomfortable) during the summer months. I always swore I'd never have a summer or early fall baby...but now I really could care less about something so petty as that.
Earlier today as I was reviewing each blog post to change names (to make the blog a bit more anonymous) I read through each old post. How much things can change in a matter of months! It's funny that time can move either slow or fast, depending on where you are at in life. For me, the past several months have moved very slowly. Not that it's a bad thing, I have certainly enjoyed my time.
In July I posted about Mr.P and I being in the discussing/planning phase of having a baby. A month later we were in the, "Let's make a baby!" mindset. Ha, if only it were that easy. I feel like once we got on the baby track, time began moving soooo slow. It's not like you can just have sex and, bam, a baby is made. Sorry friendo's, the process is a little more challenging. You have to wait until ovulation time (assuming one is actually ovulating) and even then, the window of fertility is only about 24 hours, and if sex is timed accordingly, the odds of conceiving are less than 20%. Like I've said before, babies are a miracle (unless you're a crack whore...then it's no problem getting knocked up).
The past month or so I have felt this nagging sense of limbo...not wanting to commit to plans a few months out "in case" we're pregnant. It sucks, I wish I could just freely know what was going to happen. I'm already dealing with the disappointment of knowing that we won't have a "pregnancy anouncement" for our families for the holidays. That would've been fun. I'm also realizing that if we do get pregnant in the next few months, that will mean I'll be huge (which means uncomfortable) during the summer months. I always swore I'd never have a summer or early fall baby...but now I really could care less about something so petty as that.
Plus, plus, delta.
Back when I was an AmeriCorps volunteer, our group leader always had us do what he called "plus plus delta." This was a way for us to give feedback, but the rule was that you had to say two positive things (plus') before you could say a negative (delta). If all you had was positive feedback, great, then you'd get to say three good things. If you had a complaint, you had to start by saying two positive things. I've been in a bit of a funk for a couple of weeks now, and I'm having trouble shaking it. In an effort to sound a little more positive, I thought I would use the plus plus delta model here in my blog post today:
Plus: I have tomorrow off! Yay for government holidays. I plan on relaxing and getting several little Christmas projects worked on.
Plus: There is a beer I've had twice now on tap, but have not been able to find in bottles. It's a special release by New Belgium Brewing Company called Giddy Up. It's an amber ale brewed with espresso, giving it a nice light body with a strong coffee flavor. It is unique, and delicious. Today at lunch I found it in bottles at the little grocery store near work. Tonight after my class I'm coming home to drink one (or two) of them.
Delta: I heard a Christmas jingle on the radio today and it made me realize how I am not ready for Christmas. I have no idea what to buy/make for people, and I'm just not feeling the holiday spirit yet. It's become more frequent that I have had people ask me, "When are you and (Mr.P) going to have kids?" I realize now how horrible it is to ask or be asked that question. It's actually quite personal, and then to currently be having trouble getting pregnant, it makes me feel bad to hear that. Christmastime means lots of parties and gatherings, and I am dreading hearing that question, which I know is inevitable. I can be polite or make a lighthearted joke in response, but really inside I want to cry when I hear that question.
P.S. I did a little housecleaning on my blog...I decided to make it a little more "anonymous" by removing real names. I'm not completely sold on the background design yet...more changes to come.
Plus: I have tomorrow off! Yay for government holidays. I plan on relaxing and getting several little Christmas projects worked on.
Plus: There is a beer I've had twice now on tap, but have not been able to find in bottles. It's a special release by New Belgium Brewing Company called Giddy Up. It's an amber ale brewed with espresso, giving it a nice light body with a strong coffee flavor. It is unique, and delicious. Today at lunch I found it in bottles at the little grocery store near work. Tonight after my class I'm coming home to drink one (or two) of them.
Delta: I heard a Christmas jingle on the radio today and it made me realize how I am not ready for Christmas. I have no idea what to buy/make for people, and I'm just not feeling the holiday spirit yet. It's become more frequent that I have had people ask me, "When are you and (Mr.P) going to have kids?" I realize now how horrible it is to ask or be asked that question. It's actually quite personal, and then to currently be having trouble getting pregnant, it makes me feel bad to hear that. Christmastime means lots of parties and gatherings, and I am dreading hearing that question, which I know is inevitable. I can be polite or make a lighthearted joke in response, but really inside I want to cry when I hear that question.
P.S. I did a little housecleaning on my blog...I decided to make it a little more "anonymous" by removing real names. I'm not completely sold on the background design yet...more changes to come.
Thursday, November 6, 2008
The Tudors.
Mr.P hates television programing. He loves his TV, but isn't a big fan of watching it (weird, I know). I love television, but I try to limit how much I watch. I have a select list of shows I always DVR, and I rarely just sit and channel surf (since we got dish tv, it's hard to channel surf, too many channels!)
I have successfully gotten Mr.P hooked on my two favorite sitcoms (The Office and How I Met Your Mother). Now he is obsessed with not missing an episode of either of those. He'll watch America's Next Top Model occassionally (his excuse is our house is too small, but really he could go in the other room and close the door. I think he finds the show interesting but doesn't want to admit it).
I recently ordered "The Tudors" from Netflix. When I heard that Jonathan Rhys Meyers played King Henry in this series, I couldn't resist. I am not one of those women who goes ga-ga over celebrity men, but Jonathan Rhys Meyers is sexy. He has beautiful eyes and an amazing Irish accent...but I digress. The other night I put the disc in and at first Mr.P grumbled about watching it, but after the first episode he was intrigued. We're down to one episode left on the first disc, and tonight he asked if I wanted to watch it. Ah ha! I've succeeded in getting him hooked on another tv show :-)
I have successfully gotten Mr.P hooked on my two favorite sitcoms (The Office and How I Met Your Mother). Now he is obsessed with not missing an episode of either of those. He'll watch America's Next Top Model occassionally (his excuse is our house is too small, but really he could go in the other room and close the door. I think he finds the show interesting but doesn't want to admit it).
I recently ordered "The Tudors" from Netflix. When I heard that Jonathan Rhys Meyers played King Henry in this series, I couldn't resist. I am not one of those women who goes ga-ga over celebrity men, but Jonathan Rhys Meyers is sexy. He has beautiful eyes and an amazing Irish accent...but I digress. The other night I put the disc in and at first Mr.P grumbled about watching it, but after the first episode he was intrigued. We're down to one episode left on the first disc, and tonight he asked if I wanted to watch it. Ah ha! I've succeeded in getting him hooked on another tv show :-)
Wednesday, November 5, 2008
Disappointment and nausea.
Disappointment:
I'll admit, I am disappointed by the outcome of the election. It sucks to have hope and optimism that certain candidates or issues will go in a certain direction...unfortunately, that isn't always the case. I'm sure this country will be fine and life will go on...but for now I'm going to sulk. Just a little.
Nausea:
I met with the RE on Monday, and I went back on Tuesday for my test results. They ran a battery of tests, and the good news is there were no major finding (no PCOS and no thyroid condition, those were the two biggest concerns). The basic outcome was that some of my hormones are out of wack, which is causing idiopathic anovualation. The doctor set me up with two prescriptions that will essentially "reset" my hormones and get me on track to ovulate. Unfortunately, the side effect of the first prescription (the one I'm taking right now) is that I feel kind of nauseas. But I guess that isn't too terrible, since the most common side effect of the next prescription is hot flashes. Yay for hormones! The RE wants me to test for ovulation each of the next three cycles (assuming I don't get pregnant the first or second cycle). She said that if I'm not pregnant by February, then we'll re-evaluate the plan and do some further testing. I'm glad that I met with the doctor, even though a few friends told me I should wait at least a year. I knew there was something wrong, and I trusted my gut instinct with this one. We'll see what happens!
I'll admit, I am disappointed by the outcome of the election. It sucks to have hope and optimism that certain candidates or issues will go in a certain direction...unfortunately, that isn't always the case. I'm sure this country will be fine and life will go on...but for now I'm going to sulk. Just a little.
Nausea:
I met with the RE on Monday, and I went back on Tuesday for my test results. They ran a battery of tests, and the good news is there were no major finding (no PCOS and no thyroid condition, those were the two biggest concerns). The basic outcome was that some of my hormones are out of wack, which is causing idiopathic anovualation. The doctor set me up with two prescriptions that will essentially "reset" my hormones and get me on track to ovulate. Unfortunately, the side effect of the first prescription (the one I'm taking right now) is that I feel kind of nauseas. But I guess that isn't too terrible, since the most common side effect of the next prescription is hot flashes. Yay for hormones! The RE wants me to test for ovulation each of the next three cycles (assuming I don't get pregnant the first or second cycle). She said that if I'm not pregnant by February, then we'll re-evaluate the plan and do some further testing. I'm glad that I met with the doctor, even though a few friends told me I should wait at least a year. I knew there was something wrong, and I trusted my gut instinct with this one. We'll see what happens!
Monday, November 3, 2008
The political phone calls need to stop. Now.
This weekend I received several live (and recorded) phone calls. All reminding me to vote, and asking me to vote for specific candidates. Tonight there were 2 messages on my answering machine reminding me to vote. I get it!
I already mailed in my absentee ballot. Last week.
I even had a visit Saturday morning from a few cheerful democratic volunteers making sure I was going to vote (I stood in the doorway in my PJ's, letting them know I had already mailed in my ballot). They asked if I voted for Obama and Gregoire. I lied and said yes, but actually I did not vote for either.
Here's the thing....
I do not claim to be a democrat or a republican. I consider myself to be a moderate. I actually voted for people from both parties on my ballot. There are issues I care about, but I also heavily vote based off the people running and how I feel about them as people.
My issue with Obama is that I hear a lot of talk, but that's it. I get the same feeling about the guy when I hear him speak as I do when I step onto a used car lot. I just don't feel like he's trustworthy. I take offense to someone who is in their 40's and has already penned 2 memoirs. Really? His life is that important he felt it necessary to write not 1, but 2 books about it?! Also, the guy is a smoker. I'm sorry, but I hate smoking. I think it is a nasty, disgusting, dirty habit, and those who can't break the habit are weak people. Plus, I think it sets a bad example to young people if our future president is a smoker. I was very concerned about the controversy regarding his pastor, Rev Wright, earlier this year. His policies border on socialism, and well, as a tax payer in a high bracket, I don't want to pay more taxes. In younger years I was much more gung ho about social programs, but having worked in the social system and seen how mismanaged money is, and how handouts enable laziness, I've become slightly disillusioned by the system.
*Just now as I write this, a volunteer from Obama's campaign called to remind me to vote for him tomorrow! I told him sorry, I already voted, and when he asked who I voted for, I said John McCain got my vote*
I don't think McCain is perfect, but I feel like he is more honest, and he has the experience I want to see the in the next president. I think Sarah Palin is a joke, and the more I see her speak the more angry I am....personally, I think McCain should've picked Bobby Jindal as his running mate (gov of Louisiana). I cast my vote for the president, and I feel that McCain would be a better president than Obama.
Tomorrow should be an interesting day...
I already mailed in my absentee ballot. Last week.
I even had a visit Saturday morning from a few cheerful democratic volunteers making sure I was going to vote (I stood in the doorway in my PJ's, letting them know I had already mailed in my ballot). They asked if I voted for Obama and Gregoire. I lied and said yes, but actually I did not vote for either.
Here's the thing....
I do not claim to be a democrat or a republican. I consider myself to be a moderate. I actually voted for people from both parties on my ballot. There are issues I care about, but I also heavily vote based off the people running and how I feel about them as people.
My issue with Obama is that I hear a lot of talk, but that's it. I get the same feeling about the guy when I hear him speak as I do when I step onto a used car lot. I just don't feel like he's trustworthy. I take offense to someone who is in their 40's and has already penned 2 memoirs. Really? His life is that important he felt it necessary to write not 1, but 2 books about it?! Also, the guy is a smoker. I'm sorry, but I hate smoking. I think it is a nasty, disgusting, dirty habit, and those who can't break the habit are weak people. Plus, I think it sets a bad example to young people if our future president is a smoker. I was very concerned about the controversy regarding his pastor, Rev Wright, earlier this year. His policies border on socialism, and well, as a tax payer in a high bracket, I don't want to pay more taxes. In younger years I was much more gung ho about social programs, but having worked in the social system and seen how mismanaged money is, and how handouts enable laziness, I've become slightly disillusioned by the system.
*Just now as I write this, a volunteer from Obama's campaign called to remind me to vote for him tomorrow! I told him sorry, I already voted, and when he asked who I voted for, I said John McCain got my vote*
I don't think McCain is perfect, but I feel like he is more honest, and he has the experience I want to see the in the next president. I think Sarah Palin is a joke, and the more I see her speak the more angry I am....personally, I think McCain should've picked Bobby Jindal as his running mate (gov of Louisiana). I cast my vote for the president, and I feel that McCain would be a better president than Obama.
Tomorrow should be an interesting day...
Text-o-mania.
Mr.P called to let me know that I went over my 400 txt message this past month. Oops. At least it's only about $8 in charges. The conversation ended with him needing to run an errand, but first he let me know we need to have a "chat" tonight. That's never a good sign...
5 minutes later, the following txt sequence took place:
Mr.P: pssst...I luv you :-)
PhinneyGirl: Why do I have a feeling you're going to come home and piss in my cheerios?
Mr.P: I luv cheerios ;-)
PhinneyGirl: I don't luv your piss.
5 minutes later, the following txt sequence took place:
Mr.P: pssst...I luv you :-)
PhinneyGirl: Why do I have a feeling you're going to come home and piss in my cheerios?
Mr.P: I luv cheerios ;-)
PhinneyGirl: I don't luv your piss.
Saturday, November 1, 2008
Dear ovaries.
Can you please cooperate with me? I feel like we're not communicating very well, and we need to reach an understanding so that we can both be happy. Your job is to drop kick an egg into the fallopian tube approximately 14 days into my cycle. Since you have failed to do this job, I am growing more and more frustrated with your performance (and there are two of you! Can't at least one of you cooperate? Please?)
I also do not appreciate the constant dull ache you have been causing me the past couple months. Can you tell your cyst friends to go away? I'm really hoping we can work this out on our own, but if not, I am fully prepared to bring in reinforcements (meaning, the reproductive endocrinologist). Please keep this in mind as you continue to taunt me with your laziness.
Yours truly,
PhinneyGirl
I also do not appreciate the constant dull ache you have been causing me the past couple months. Can you tell your cyst friends to go away? I'm really hoping we can work this out on our own, but if not, I am fully prepared to bring in reinforcements (meaning, the reproductive endocrinologist). Please keep this in mind as you continue to taunt me with your laziness.
Yours truly,
PhinneyGirl
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